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LAGGING AT LAUNCH

(OR HOW I LEARNED TO AVOID HYPE AND GROUPTHINK)

by William “JoBildo” Murphy

It’s a great feeling as a gamer when a title you’ve been waiting ages for finally releases after months of eager anticipation. You head down to your local game store, at midnight if they deem it appropriate, you stand in line with a cluster of your kindred gaming spirits, and you grin from ear to ear when the clerk hands you your copy. The smile doesn’t fade even on the long, slow ride home. In fact, the smile isn’t wiped from your naïve face until you finally get the game installed on your PC and are made heart-broken to realize that the game you thought might be the second coming of Jesus in electronic form is really little more than the twelfth coming of your Uncle Merl to the annual family barbeque.

Yes, those of us who share the passion of gaming all know this kind of heartache. What makes us so blind? What drives us to expect, time and again, that the same marketed promises from people whose job it is to sell us things are actually true? I can see Tom Cullen of “The Stand” possibly being so mislead, but even for him it’s a stretch (though admittedly he had Nick Andros to hold his hand the lucky fool).

Here’s a general rule of thumb for weighing your expectations for any product before you actually get to experience it: take the advertisement for any given product, erase marketing buzzwords, and then reread it. You’re very likely to have something more valuable at this point, and something that won’t erroneously raise your hopes, leaving you a broken husk of a man (or woman) when in fact the product does not grant you invincibility, unlimited wealth, or beauty beyond your wildest dreams.

By now, you’re probably asking yourself… what does any of this have to do with Age of Conan? Well, good sir or madam, if you’re asking yourself that I daresay you and Tom Cullen might have a lot in common. M-O-O-N: that spells thick-headed.

What all that lengthy set up was for amounts to simply this: step back and take a deep breath. These games we love, from Age of Conan and all the way back to Meridian 59 (or ever further if you’re picky), have a way of digging deep into our hearts and not letting go. They’re not just games to us; they’re passions on the same level as the drunken painted fat guys you see in the bleachers at a Cubs game, crying when the team loses in the 11^th inning. It’s very easy to get defensive, angst-filled, or even downright upset over whatever MMOG it is you inhabit.

But the sad state of software development is that nothing ever goes 100% according to plan. This is especially true when you take into effect deadlines and mounting pressure from higher-ups. It’s very easy as a player to sit down and hammer our dozens of problems you have with the way things work in your game of choice, but it’s not so easy to be on the other end of that spectrum, pouring your heart and soul into the development of a product only to have your audience throw mud in your eyes.

In no way am I saying to cut your developers slack. Funcom (and any MMOG developer) are not only software developers, but service providers just as well. We should feel encouraged and helpful by providing feedback on the state of the game we pay to play. But when I say feedback, I don’t mean virulent expletives smothered in tasty “l33t-sauce” just because you encountered a bug that particularly peeved you off. This is when that old Carl Winslow anger-management technique can come in handy: “3-2-1, 1-2-3. What the heck is bothering me?” If it can keep that Chicago cop from murdering Steve Urkel, it can likely keep you from having a heart attack over something much less annoying.

Disclaimer: The opinions, beliefs and viewpoints expressed are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs and viewpoints of the Ten Ton Hammer network or staff.